the hardest is to let you go...

I just come back home from airport.
I feel so sad ,and I feel like someone ripped out my heart, it's breaking.
I really hate any kind of separations...
All way to the airport I felt like I couldn't breathe and I really fight with my emotions and tried to remind strong as much as I could. I knew for him was also hard , I could see it on his face ,too.
He was hidding behind that amazing smile, like he was tried to be strong for both of us , he still made some jokes too, but mostly whole way to there we remained silent .

I'm really not in the mood to even write this or talk about it.... because all I had in my head is 'I don't want to let him go' ... even if I know we gonna see each outher ,and we are engaged ,we gonna get married too eventually some day... so even knowing all this ,and knowing his feelings,I was sad, I so get used to his presence here everyday,to wake up beside him ,get up beside him ....doing everything toghether ...and now I have to get used to that he is not here again ....
It's really hard. And it's just passed few hours ...

I'm gonna write later... or maybe other day.
now I really can't ...

Rina